![]() ![]() ![]() Before everyone gets there, he locks up his Piaget watch and a baseball he says belonged to Babe Ruth. It’s at the Palace, of course, and since Chuck owns it, he gets to be the host. Jude’s celebrate getting through Ivy Week with the annual “Lost Weekend” party. Near the end, when Serena is setting up a date with a skeptical Dan Humphrey, she says, “I’m hanging up before thou dost protest again!” Plus 3, because really, what teenage girl in the city doesn’t think at some point that she’s Julia Stiles?.Nate, when deciding to ditch his friends for the scary poker game, has to use his BlackBerry to figure out where Queens is.Especially the ridiculous basketball outfits. Plus 2, because that’s actually just what we’d expect from UES boys. During the extremely cool “Lost Weekend,” we catch the boys doing outrageously uncommon things like playing Wii Boxing and going to the Lower East Side to play basketball in ridiculous outfits.Also, Plus 2 for Chuck’s amazing line, “He looks like Matthew McConaughey between movies.” It changed my life, man.” Ha! Plus 10. The Baja shirt is a little much, but this guy is a total archetype. Where’s Carter been all this time? “Yeah, I did some reconstruction work post-Katrina,” he says, rubbing his stubble. Nate and Chuck are surprised when their old friend Carter Bazin, who shrugged off his life of privilege for the privilege of bumming around the globe with a digital camera, strolls into their annual “Lost Weekend” party (more on that later).It would be more if homeless men leered, too. Nolita may have $400 jeans and Hollywould flats, but to uptowners, it’s still kind of like visiting another country. Then, when Dan Humphrey shows up, Blair flounces off, saying, “When you’re done with your charity work, I’ll be at Tory Burch looking at … ponchos.” Plus 2. We’re to assume that this is Serena’s idea, because she’s such a free spirit, and also because Blair is so weird about it: “It’s called Nolita, not no showers,” she says. Serena and Blair go shopping in Nolita.“Before you tuck into that, you might find the low-fat yogurt more appealing,” she says. Blair’s mom eyes her when Blair picks up a croissant.An Upper East Side princess would totally dream that. We were going to give this a Minus 2, because no one has dreams that are this obvious and only gay twentysomethings wear satin eye masks, but instead we’re giving it a Plus 1 for the casually racist minorities-in-uniform thing. But wait: Cut to Blair in bed, pulling off her satin eye mask. Blair tries to get in to join them, but the doorman won’t let her in! Serena’s having all the fun while Blair’s locked out. She looks in the window and sees Serena, being served tea by Nameless Asian Friend and Nameless Black Friend, each of whom is wearing French maid outfits. “Moon River” is playing the background, and she’s dressed in full Holly Golightly going on: black dress, pearls. Below, our guide to what seemed passably real in episode four: ‘Bad News Blair’ and what came across faker than a Fendi purse at public school. Which is why we’re keeping tabs on each episode. Which is too bad for us, because the show known in some circles as Jeffrey Epstein’s Wet Dreamjust got picked up for a full season, and what’s it going to be about if not Blair and Serena calling each other sluts and battling it out in field-hockey uniforms? That said, it is a smidge realistic for two teenage girls who have been fighting for months and months to one day suddenly be besties again, isn’t it? And that’s what this recap is all about, right? Realism! Because if Gossip Girl is to live up to those that came before it, the greats like Dallas, Melrose Place, Sex and the City … in short, if it wants to win over the hearts and souls and disposable income of a generation of aspirational young women, it had best represent - or at least preserve the essence of - the lives of actual Upper East Side teenagers. This week, the bon-mot-tossing, label-whoring pair is all Stila-slicked smiles. ![]() And just like that, their major feud was over. It was a glorious scene: fantastic outfits, fraught dialogue, rain pouring down - that showed their range. When last we left Gossip Girl, Serena and Blair had just made up in Central Park. ![]()
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